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September 23. 2003

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Greetings and salutations, school is back in session; the Edgemiester is back! I forgot to mention a couple of weeks ago that I would be absent due to some promotional work in Toronto and Germany. Thankfully, the Mad Sensei of Mattitudinism filled in for yours truly last week, and did a bang up job. Thanks to ol' V1 for filling in, and being one of my closest friends in the biz. All of the things Matt mentioned are indeed true, and for some reason do seem to involve alcohol, but we could also sit in a waffle house for three hours and talk wrestling. It's a beautiful thing. He's definitely on my list of guys I'd love to wrestle when I come back. The MFers vs. the Edgeheads, the Edge Army vs. The V1 Nation (I just made that one up), he has Shannon Moore, I have...well I don't need anyone, dammit! We've had fun in the ring in the past, and I'm sure we will again in the future. Kudos Veeee-one-uhhhhh, the most under-utilized man in the business!

Well it's been a busy and somewhat eventful two weeks. I had an initiation to the premiere of Neve Campbells new movie, The Company, at the Toronto Film Festival. It was about ballet, so it wasn't exactly up my alley, but I couldn't turn down that kind of invite. From there it was on to a whirlwind tour of Germany. I flew direct from Toronto at 7 p.m. Saturday night and arrived 9 a.m. Sunday morning into Frankfurt (the hometown of Christian's wife, Denise), only to find that Air Canada (the worst airline in the world) had neglected to bring my bags. I had a full day of appearances, so while my bags collected dust in Toronto, I was forced to scramble and buy some clothes to get me through the day. You see when I travel long distances, I go in slob-wear. The more comfortable the better, but not good for appearances. Everything in Germany is closed on Sundays, but luckily we were at the airport and Hugo Boss was open. I grabbed the first things I saw, put them on, bought them, and hit the ground running to the U.S. army base in Weisbaden. From there, it was on to a soccer (football in Germany) game in Kaiserslautern. Finally, on to Cologne and some sleep after 34 hours awake.

I stayed in Cologne for most of the week driving around in the Edge van. The Kolnarena (the arena holding our Passport to Pain show Oct.10 in Cologne) had done up our vehicle with huge decals of my ugly mug on the side. Suffice it to say it's pretty embarrassing to drive around in a van with you plastered all over it.

Every night after dinner I walked to a cathedral built in the 13th century. The size of it boggles the mind, and if you are ever in Cologne, do yourself a favor and check it out, trust me, you can't miss it. The highlight of my trip was a great lunch with a 12 year old girl named Denise from the Make-A-Wish Foundation in Dusseldorf. We had a great lunch with her and her dad, and the time went by far too quickly, but I'd like to thank them both for giving me such a nice day. Another great highlight was my steal of the century. I visited the largest music store in Europe while in Cologne. Thought I'd take a peek and play a few axes. While playing a metallic blue Steve Vai Ibanez, I turned, and saw a light from the heavens shining down. Directly onto a signature Richie Sambora Fender Strat. I've been looking for this guitar for some time, but coming up short, so you can imagine my excitement. Better yet, it was autographed by the man himself. What the ****? Seems Richie strolled in on Bon Jovi's last world tour with a cup of joe and wanted to play. They quickly produced their Sambora strat, which he played and signed. I tried to calmly ask how much. The young sales guy told me the price. I said I'll take it quicker than Angle can slap on the ankle lock. The sales manager came, and seemed perplexed. Through my trusty German guides Stefan and Stefan (sounds like a bad German sitcom), I came to find out the guitar was not supposed to be for sale, the young guy had made a mistake, but that he would give it to me for the quoted price. I snatched it and walked out feeling like I robbed the place, but dammit, now I can give love a bad name (brutal, I know). The yellow beauty now adorns my wall! Finally, it was on to Munich and my final appearances, but not before some serious sightseeing.

After travelling home for 17 hours with time changes from Munich to Tampa, my bad luck with bags continued. They wouldn't let me bring the guitar on board, but I had a hard case for it, so I obliged. When I got to Tampa everything came, but, you guessed it, my guitar. Go figure. While thoughts of a baggage handler stealing my guitar flashed through my head, I hailed a taxi home. Yep, a taxi. You see I thought I was coming home on a Sunday. Instead it was Saturday, the night of my wife Alanah's figures competition (which she won, 4th in a row, my little champeen!). I didn't take my car to the airport. I had her drop me off thinking she could pick me up. Not so.

She was on stage while I landed. My other dilemma was the fact that I did not have our gate clicker (we live in a gated community). This meant I had to hop our ten foot, and sharp, gate. It ended up being a good test for the neck, and I made it. I collapsed in my bed, and basically haven't left it since.

All in all, though, I had a good couple of weeks. Thanks to Jane from our London WWE offices, Stefan from Germany, and Herr Fischerrrrr (long story) from the Kolnarena, I got to experience Germany, and had a great time. Too bad I flew out just as Octoberfest was starting. I did come back with a little German dialect under my belt, and with the knowledge that in Germany, the mullet is back. Even though I am a former mulleteer, I, too, cannot understand this fashion faus paux. Let's pray that besides Eddie Guerrero, it does not reach our shores. When it comes to wrestling, I hate to admit, I'm out of the loop. Being in Germany I missed the 60-minute WWE Ironman Match between Kurt Angle and Brock Lesnar, but I heard it's one for the ages. Glad to see Lita back, and I'll definitely be watching her progress closely. Here's hoping the neck holds and she can excite our fans for a long time to come.

In closing I'd just like to say Guten Abend (good evening), and you have just been Edgeucated!

Credit: WWE.com